Texts From Last Night

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  (714): View more from California

  I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.

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  (714): I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy. http://tfl.nu/mwni
  Replies (11) Good night (1411) Bad night (3462)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.

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  (843): plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone. http://tfl.nu/rlid
  Replies (69) Good night (5089) Bad night (767)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?

  (567): View more from Ohio

  EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.

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  (419): do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water? (567): EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now. http://tfl.nu/1pyg
  Replies (47) Good night (843) Bad night (5736)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues

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  (917): you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues http://tfl.nu/bwbh
  Replies (7) Good night (4690) Bad night (1175)
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  (347): View more from New York

  Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....

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  (347): Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night..... http://tfl.nu/buh9
  Replies (14) Good night (1821) Bad night (4818)
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  (916): View more from California

  on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.

  (1-916): View more from California

  your optimism is becoming unhealthy

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  (916): on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day. (1-916): your optimism is becoming unhealthy http://tfl.nu/nzqt
  Replies (9) Good night (4426) Bad night (1511)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings

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  (214): More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings http://tfl.nu/n37n
  Replies (14) Good night (2755) Bad night (1352)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"

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  (617): We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?" http://tfl.nu/sgk0
  Replies (18) Good night (990) Bad night (4872)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car

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  (202): You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car http://tfl.nu/q6jc
  Replies (1) Good night (1945) Bad night (827)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.

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  (+44): Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out. http://tfl.nu/bww1
  Replies (11) Good night (5813) Bad night (999)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks

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  (260): U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks http://tfl.nu/ak2u
  Replies (10) Good night (2435) Bad night (1218)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"

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  (484): Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret" http://tfl.nu/9brs
  Replies (20) Good night (5035) Bad night (801)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?

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  (919): Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight? http://tfl.nu/hr5u
  Replies (3) Good night (1056) Bad night (468)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?

  (512): View more from Texas

  Won't she run out of nose eventually?

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  (254): She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually? (512): Won't she run out of nose eventually? http://tfl.nu/f0dc
  Replies (3) Good night (573) Bad night (642)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.

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  (713): walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain. http://tfl.nu/bj1a
  Replies (3) Good night (710) Bad night (344)

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