He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Randomize
