Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
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