return my video game
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
