Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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