So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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