I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
No subtext here. People are naked.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
