Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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