The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize