is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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