I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
