I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
