God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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