Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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