if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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