I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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