in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I just want to make out with him forever
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Will exercising make me less horny?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
