Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
