I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
