you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
