Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
