So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
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Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
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just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
He shit in the fireplace
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