I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
