does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
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