who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
