is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Randomize
