Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
