"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
These tits shall not be calmed
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
