i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
