Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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