I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Randomize
