so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
