Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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