Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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