no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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