How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize