I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..