And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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