How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Vodka?
Forever.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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