I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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