Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Randomize
