OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
