what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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