is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
