Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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