found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
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So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
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Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
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