I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
