to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Drunk walkin through police station. America
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
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