You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
