I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
