Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Randomize
