doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
